I’m not actively dating at present, far too much going on to invest the time. My key distraction / excuse is a house refurbishment, with the aim of not having to live through another winter with no heating. Yes, really in 2017 in the UK I’ve not had any heating. I also have two broken toilets, only one can be used and you have to flush it manually. And no hot water on demand either. Anyway, am not moaning about it as it is a lovely house and I am lucky to have it – but there is a lot to do and bit by bit (when I’ve saved up funds) I am trying to get things improved. Latest mini project is to get 1) a gas supply and then 2) a central heating system installed this summer.
Don’t worry I am not planning to turn a dating blog into a ‘how not to renovate your home’ blog, but as I have no recent dating experiences to write about, thought I would share the latest messages I have received on OkCupid in the last few weeks.
I have provided a score and commentary for each.
I have rated them from 1 to 7, where 7 is good and 1 is dire – do you agree with the ratings?
Hi there how are you? You look gorgeous 😉
This is pretty standard, but is positive and a relatively good opener – but I don’t like the wink, so it gets a 4 from me
Hey fancy a chat sowetime?
Although a question mark has been used, the spelling mistake / typo does put me off and I don’t really like ‘chatting’ to be honest, so it’s a 1
How are you doing
Utterly turgid, shows no thought, and no question mark. Never going to get a reply from me, it’s a 1 (and only gets a score because the words ‘are and you’ have been used rather than RU.
Also, unless you’re Joey from Friends, never ask me this.
Hi.. How are you?
As above, but slightly higher mark (1.5) as has used a question mark. Seriously I am tempted to reply to one of these ‘how are you’ questions with the truth one day…
…”Oh, like thanks for asking the last few weeks have been really challenging. My car tax, insurance and MOT are all due and I’ve just found out that the car requires £700 spent on it to pass the MOT. Also I’m in arrears with the electricity supplier and owe them £300 which they’re chasing for. And I was ill last week with a stomach bug and vomitted on my shoes – twice. Other than that I am just tickkety boo thanks – how RU”?
Good morning you ok?
As above, score 1.5. Such a boring way to try and open a conversation. I have written a profile – find something in there to comment on and ask me about it. Having said that, one guy picked up on the fact that I last updated my profile a year ago post-Brexit whilst in a real rage and wrote ‘leavers need not apply’ or something of that ilk. One guy in April sent me a message telling me that I should be over it by now and need to put it in the past. Whatever – he didn’t get a reply either.
Loving your pics hunny, your stunning but I’m guessing by age might put you off me
Okay, well I really don’t like being called ‘hunny’, I’ve never been a fan of any kind of pet names – yuck. But my issue with this, and the reason he didn’t get a response was two-fold. Firstly he’s 34! Only a few years younger than me, and I’ve been dating someone ten years my junior for years – why would he think age is an issue? Obviously it must be for him – so he can jog on. Then secondly, he lives in Birmingham – so I am guessing that he’s not actually up for dating anyway and I live miles away in a different city and have never been a fan of the long-distance love affair! Score – 1.5
Lovely photos (licking lips smiley face)
Score is 0 – a licking lips smiley face – oh really, this makes me feel a bit sick. Yuck, yuck, yuck.
Hi xx are you up for a chat?
I think you can guess a rough score – it’s a 1 from me.
So there we go. Not a rich vein of dating options for me on OkCupid recently – or am I being far too picky? Is it normal to get this low quality of message?
Anyway, at least I am getting messages. On Tinder I have not received a message for months (admittedly have rarely been on there). I am feeling a bit awkward because someone I know keeps coming up, and I suspect his mates have got hold of his phone and swiped right for a laugh! I don’t want to swipe him left, so my Tinder keeps getting stuck on his face – so I see it every time I open the app – aggghh!
Hope to have something to write about in a few weeks, if a more interesting message comes through in the meantime I shall let you know.
I know it’s bad to live in the past – but I do hanker for the good old days when I used to get messages like ‘naked ping pong – yes?’